How the Worst Can Make You Your Best

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A brief article by Jim Rendon in the August 3, 2015 issue of Time magazine, titled “How trauma can change lives for the better,” stated that an estimated 75% of us will experience a traumatic event at some point. Those events inevitably  will cause pain and suffering. But in the 1990s, two psychologists (Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun) interviewed 600 survivors and were intrigued to find that, after the pain, many said their lives changed for the better. They reoriented themselves, adopted different perspectives, changed their goals. The psychologists named this phenomenon “posttraumatic growth.”

I have had the privilege to witness this type of growth in many of my clients. It’s exciting to watch victims devastated by rape, sexual abuse, loss, and illness move past the trauma and become more than just survivors. They become transcenders. I have seen a mother who had been a petty criminal spearhead an annual drive to provide books for needy children after the death of her three-year-old son.  I’ve watched clients bearing scars from early abuse become counselors, nurses, and volunteers. Then there is the client who nearly died in a recent motor vehicle accident, and another who was in a coma for almost a month after her car was struck by a semi. Both of these individuals had struggled with chronic depression. Now, although they suffer residual limitations from their injuries, each has moved beyond depression to become more active in the community, more giving of themselves, more enthusiastic about life.

As Jim Rendon writes, “Growth begins with healing from trauma. But people have the capacity to do far more than just heal. Ultimately, they can become better versions of themselves.”